is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
The Olympian is in my bed
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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