What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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