"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
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