I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
