But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
