Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
