i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
