wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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