Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
