i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
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