I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
