your room smells of hookers.
And success
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
