i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
