Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Hippo gnu deer
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Randomize
