Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
