Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
