I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
