Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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