You really coming over, don't trick.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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