are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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