Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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