The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
