I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
