i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
