My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
