i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
