She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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