hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
