After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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