therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
