ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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