bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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