Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
