She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
