But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
