She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
