when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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