She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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