Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
We had sex on a dog bed..
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
