he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
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