I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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