In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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