the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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