Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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