I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Randomize