i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
