there was a trapeze. enough said
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Randomize
