Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Randomize
