WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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