come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
